Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell Speak Out About Their Short Marriage

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Is All As It Seems?

Just as we were rooting for the marriage of this Hollywood power couple to work, Dax admitted that things were not all sunshine and rainbows for the pair.

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How Is Kristen Effected?

The couple has made it clear that for their marriage to work, they have to work hard on it. Dax recently said, “You really have to be maintaining the relationship, and it is work, and it’s often uncomfortable work, but it needs doing, or we won’t stay together.” Dax certainly has not always made it easy for Kristen, and she has announced that his substance abuse addiction has affected the pair as a couple. Kristen has revealed the impact her husband’s addictions have had on her.

It Was Not Love At First Sight

The couple first met in 2007 at a mutual friends birthday party, and Dax did not fall for Kristen the moment he met her. “When I met her and her friends, I was suspicious of their unbridled happiness,” he told Good Housekeeping magazine. “I thought, ‘something stinks here; they’re in a cult.'” However, it seems that fate was running its course since the pair ran into each other once again just two weeks later at a Detroit Red Wings hockey game.

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Certainly Not A Match On Paper

Just before the pair began dating, Dax Shepard was another one of Hollywood’s leading ladies. Dax dated Kate Hudson back in 2007, but their relationship only lasted a couple of months. What was it that attracted Kristen to the comedic actor? Well, he admitted to Playboy magazine in 2012, that, at first, everything he had done and been through ‘were terrifying to her.’ He continued, “and she had a hard time believing I would ever be able to stay married and monogamous and a father and all those things.”

Leading Opposite Lives

The good girl from Michigan was a far cry away from the bad boy from Michigan. In fact, the only thing the pair had in common was that they were both actors and both from Michigan. In his former years, Dax’s true love was Jack Daniels, and he was addicted to illicit substances. Meanwhile, Bell was proving her worth in Hollywood when she landed the title role in the television series, Veronica Mars, as well as, making many appearances in the hit series, Heroes.

Living Different Lives

Meanwhile, 2007 also marked the year Bell ended her five-year relationship with former fiancé Kevin Mann. Speaking to Complex magazine, she said that dating “makes me want to vomit. And not out of grossness—OK, a little bit out of grossness, but just nerves… I’ve always been a serial monogamist.” This is perhaps why Dax Shepard would not have been her first choice as her future husband and father of her children since he was in a completely different headspace.

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The Story Could Have Been Very Different

Dax surprisingly recently revealed that he was crushing on another Hollywood actress two years before meeting Kristen Bell. While appearing on Anna Faris’ ‘Unqualified’ podcast, he confessed, “I saw ‘Just Friends’ and was like, ‘You are so talented’ and you and I sat next to each other during a premiere… [I thought] ‘I would definitely like to take this person on a date.’ Then from my point of view, that door was shut. It was like a dead-bolt door.”

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Fast Forward 12 Years

On his 12th year of being sober, Dax took to Twitter to share his big news. For his post, he wrote, “12 years ago today I came out of my last toxic, life-threatening stupor,” he wrote. “I have a wife & babies & some self-esteem,” he continued, adding the hashtags “gratitude “and “promises.” The When In Rome actor came out on the other side of his addictions, but his substance abuse had a different impact on the couple’s lives, a different one to what they would have thought.

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The Couple Who Marry One Another, Film With One Another

The couple got married and had two daughters together – Lincoln Bell Shepard and Delta Bell Shepard. Moreover, they also starred in several films alongside one another, including The Boss, Hit & Run, When In Rome, and CHiPS. In fact, CHiPS was directed by Dax, and he nearly did not want to cast Kristen Bell in the film. He said, that the two would play an on-screen married couple where she is constantly cheating on him. However, Kristen explains another problem he had with casting his wife.

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When Push Comes To Shove

They may be a real-life couple, but Dax had his reservations about casting his wife in the film. He said to her, ‘I don’t know if I can cast you because you come across too likable.’ While Kristen defended herself from his comment, he followed his comment with, ‘We’re a couple. I don’t want the audience to root for us.’ It seems that Kristen got her way, however, and proved her worth for the role in the film.

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It’s Not All Good

While they have worked well together both on and off-screen, Dax has been open about the realities of his marriage. Since they are complete opposites but have managed to sustain a relationship for ten years, Dax does not want people to think this is an easy task. “My only fear is that people see us and think, ‘Oh, I just need to find my Kristen Bell.’ That’s not true,” he said. “You’ll find your Kristen Bell but guess what, now the work starts.”

Not Believing In The One

In fact, even though the couple may look as though they are each other’s forever and always, the couple admits that they do not even believe in ‘the one.’ Dax expressed, “We don’t believe in the fairytale… We are opposites and it has taken a tremendous amount of work and therapy for us to coexist.” After all, when they met, Dax struggled “almost weekly” with substance abuse addiction, and Bell reveals that it was “not electric” when they first met.

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Dax Was In Another Place

Although it has been over ten years since the couple first got together, Dax and Kristen did break-up early on in their relationship. After dating for just three months, Kristen recalls, “He sat me down and said, ‘I can’t have this right now. I think you’re wonderful, but I am still dating other people.’ And then I, like, liquefied and fell to the ground, but I felt incredibly respected that he had the b**s to tell me we weren’t in the same place.”

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Forgiven But Not Forgotten

Kristen admits that she knew he had made a mistake, for which we would all agree now, and it only took Dax four days to realize the same. He called Kristen and said, “I don’t know what I was thinking. I was dating someone else, but they’re just not as interesting as you, and I don’t know what I’m doing.” While she was sure to forgive him, she has certainly not forgotten and states, “I still always remind him of when he broke up with me.”

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Fighting For Equality

Just as their romance was not the most conventional in Hollywood, nor was it any different when they were set to get married. After three years of dating, the couple announced their engagement in January 2010. They later announced that they would delay tying the knot until the state of California passed legislation legalizing same-sex marriage. It was three years later, after section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act fell on June 26, 2013, that talks about marriage for the couple were brought up once again.

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Kristen’s Turn To Propose

It was on the same date that section three of the Defense of Marriage Act fell, that Kristen Bell took to Twitter to ask a very important question to Dax Shepard. Having waited for that day to pass, Bell was now ready to get married, and she wrote the message: @daxshepard1 will you marry me? Xo #marriageequality #loveislove.” Even though technically, the pair were already engaged, Dax accepted, and the pair were officially set to become husband and wife after a three-year-long engagement.

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I Now Pronounce You Husband And Wife

Before their wedding took place, Kristen and Dax welcomed their first daughter, Lincoln Bell Shepard, who was born on March 28, 2013. Then on October 17 of that same year, the couple were officially married at the Beverly Hills County Clerk’s Office. Just as the couple keeps things slightly unconventional, Kristen didn’t even wear a white wedding gown. Instead, the couple exchanged vows with Dax in a suit and Kristen sporting a black dress; the whole day cost the Hit and Run actors just $142.

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Cleaning Up His Act

Dax never made his addictions with illicit substances a secret, and nor did Kristen when it came to speaking about her doting husband. “He’s a wonderful father,” Bell said. “He knows the value of things. He was an addict for many, many years and he pulled himself out of it, and he’s been sober for 11, 12 years now. And he knows how many times he’s messed up and how many times he’s been really close to losing everything.”

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Working Their Marriage Like A Job

The couple claims that their marriage works because they work it “like a job” and that they have to “just commit to things.” Shepard explained, “If I say, ‘Hey, what are you doing Thursday?’ It’s never going to happen. But if I put something on the calendar … it works out.” He added, “But you do have to take it as seriously as you take your work commitments. It has to be scheduled, and you have to prioritize it, or it doesn’t happen.”

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Talking It Out Is The Best Medicine

It seems as though the couple has been working on their relationship from the moment they first got together, and state that therapy has helped throughout their journey and is still important to the couple while married. Speaking of therapy, Kristen told PEOPLE, “We have a very healthy marriage, and we got there by doing therapy when we needed it, and constantly doing fierce moral inventories.” She continued, “We both take responsibility when we are wrong, and I think it is easy to work with him because I married him.”

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Keeping The Romance Alive

The couple even tries to win the other one over with sweet gestures. The Parenthood actor spoke of the most romantic thing he ever did for his wife saying, “We got into this really crazy one-upmanship of — so she was doing a movie in Alaska and I was shooting Parenthood, and I couldn’t go, and she was going away for a long time.But then my schedule changed and I didn’t tell her, so I got the seat next to her on the airplane.”

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Two Can Play That Game

On this story, he continued, “and then I sweet-talked the gate representative to let me on the plane early. So when she went to sit down, I was in her seat reading a newspaper and she kept going, ‘Excuse me, sir. Excuse me, sir. I think you’re in my seat.’ And then she noticed those hands look familiar and then she started bawling when she saw that I was on the flight,” he said. “And then so she did it to me on the way back.”

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Kristen Speaks Out

Kristen and Dax may have been able to overcome all the obstacles that came their way, but the Veronica Mars actress has spoken out about her husband’s former battles. While she has expressed her delight and admiration for Dax’s ability to stay sober for so many years, she has revealed how his substance abuse still impacts her everyday life today. However, this is not because of her concerns for Dax and the prospect of him falling off the bandwagon once again.

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Kristen Has Faced Her Own Troubles

Before, and after, meeting Dax Shepard, Kristen Bell has been in some major television shows and movies. She was the lead role in Veronica Mars and starred in films such as Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Burlesque, and Bad Moms. Bell also lent her voice for the lead role of Anna in Frozen, as well as, Priscilla, the sloth in the animated comedy film, Zootopia. While she has starred in some major box-office hits, including many comedies, Bell has admitted that she has struggled with mental health issues.

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Getting Candid

While Bell may be a successful actress and prove herself as one of the funny women in Hollywood, she has also spoken of her struggles with mental health. In May 2016, Bell explained that she has struggled with depression, anxiety, and ADHD, all of which she has received treatment for as a result. She said, “It’s important for me to be candid about this so people in a similar situation can realize that they are not worthless and that they do have something to offer.”

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Looking At It Head On

Having spoken of her struggles with depression, anxiety, and ADHD, it is perhaps no surprise that she has compassion for her husband who went through his own struggles. It is with this in mind, that she has revealed how she acts and feels these days, and not for herself or her husband. Rather, she admits that looks at the world differently, and for others who could be in a situation where they just need better help with overcoming their battles.

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An Affinity To Helping People

Speaking of addiction, Bell spoke to E! to express her thoughts. She said, “I have a particular affinity towards helping people who feel outcast whether they’ve made mistakes, like having past felony convictions or recovering addicts.” She continued by explaining her reasoning for feeling this way, and how she believes people should be taking this problem on in a different way to how they always have. More importantly, she explained how she has been so impacted by this, to get to this point.

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Getting Through It

During her talk with E!, she continued, “My husband [Dax Shepard] is in recovery and is almost 13 years sober. And seeing the world through his eyes has really opened mine to knowing that it is a disease, and nobody is choosing to drink more than others, they are doing it because of a variety of reasons and they deserve the attention of a mental health professional, and not the county jail or however else we’re choosing to pretend we’re fixing the problem.”

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Real Life vs The Movies

The couple has never shied away from opening up about their past, nor the troubles they have experienced in life. In fact, they would be the first couple to say how what you see on the TV, in movies, or in books is not the real lives they are living. Instead, it is a very different story to what fans and viewers know of these Hollywood celebrities. Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard have proven this and have worked on it individually and as a couple.

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Her Words Of Wisdom

When a man wrote to Kristen to ask if she could write to their friend getting married, she chose to give them some words of wisdom. After all, she has been with her husband for ten years, and that is hard to come by when you’re working in Hollywood. Her words of wisdom were ‘Take necessary separateness. It will make your marriage better. Loving someone despite their faults, failings, or character defects, is the most powerful loving thing you can do.”

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